Kids playing ‘badminton’ in Yangon, Myanmar reminds me of my childhood using plastic box covers and hairtie to play with my cousin in 1996/7 ~ after a while, we were taken to a shop to buy our first real badminton set for 60,000 VND (less than 3 US dollars now)
Cho tôi một vé đi về tuổi thơ 👣
summer 2016
vỉa hè…
mẹ…
Việt Nam…
hơi buồn…
người con gái Việt Nam da vàng
yêu quê hương như yêu đồng lúa chín
người con gái Việt Nam da vàng
yêu quê hương nước mắt lưng tròng
another petition?
maybe Vietnam has to die
to be born again…
we’re gonna be
sinking soon
we’re gonna be sinking soon
everybody
hold your breath
coz we’re gonna be sinking soon
cứ trôi thôi
rồi kiếp này cũng hết
để là đất
là cây
20. 3. 2017
lived in the west
long enough
to hold dearly
the hidden charm
of a girl
to find the attraction
to an eastern guy
an ‘oriental’
feeling
vécu dans l’ouest
assez longtemps
pour tenir tendrement
le charme caché
d’une jeune fille
couverte
de trouver
de l’attrait
pour un gars de l’est
une sensation
orientale
sống bên phía Tây
đủ lâu
để nâng niu
cái đẹp
ẩn giấu
của em
kín đáo
để cảm thấy
phương Đông
khi để ý đến anh
20. 3. 2017
parents is a meal
we’re born into,
grew from then apart
reaching towards the sun,
taking in the rain
to keep us grounded
suffering
reminds us
of
happiness
intertwined
bố mẹ là bữa ăn
mình sinh vào
lớn lên, bay đi
với tới trời
uống mưa
rễ níu lại
cho vững chãi
nỗi buồn
nhắc nhở
niềm vui
quấn quýt
trong nhau
20. 3. 2017
the meaning of life seems to be sharing the seemingly meaninglessness of life with one another when we question the meaning of life…
winter blues, deadlines, some rejections, some emotionally unavailable romance, social/ family/ fertility pressure, transition time with rent ~ food ~ allergies, new covid phase and fear, war newsfeed, others’ sadness… a little bit of everything are finally piling up and hitting me these (later in the) days mentally physically
earlier in the days i can still sing and dance, yet when the night comes, it darkens my world bits by bits ~ maybe that’s how winter colours life. is spring here before the intense summer ~ why am i still living in the concrete city with its hardened soul covered by pollution, noise and piled up pains, good food and lively romance in central hanoi until the msg/ pesticides upset my body like a complicated relationship…
i thought if there would be another lockdown, i should move somewhere with more nature. i guess there won’t be official lockdown any more but our own locking until down…
our minds are told to be like city road maps yet our emotions weave and intertwine as endless roots in jungles
p.s. the bored politicians/ power gamers can gather in some stadium and fight among themselves and let civilians alone? who want to support that can pay for the tickets to watch them?
6. 3. 2022
In Hanoi when I was going to (elite) schools, I was asked by friends’ parents about my parents’ jobs. Some were not allowed to be friends with me because my parents are not ‘elite’ as theirs.
I am later aware that my mum’s more intellectual and knowledgable about health, music, ethics than some of those who look or sound more ‘elite’ because of their or their husbands’ job statuses. My mum and I actually had the same biology teacher in highschool though she went to a village one, the teacher was teaching there due to the war in Hanoi. Though she didn’t get her degree from a top college, she is passionate and thirsts for knowledge in what she cares about and those that matters actually. She quit state job after the communism time to have a food stall close to our house to take care of me.
In Saigon, when applying for jobs, I am asked by Vietnamese bosses about my parents’ jobs. I then get accepted by them because my parents are not elite meaning they’re not related to the government I would guess.
I would encourage my mum to take a course at GRAIN Cooking Studio to improve her cooking skills and turn her passion in health and food into beautiful dishes inside out
Thinking about my Couchsurfing host in Begen, Norway who has a degree in Archaeology and is happy working in a bar where minimum wage is twice compared to England’s and still reads archaeology books. The young maid who is working for my host in Saigon has been working since 7, got quarrelled at and learns to quarrel back at her bosses, earns more than an average office job and work less, doesn’t know how to read, enjoys watching cartoons in English on TV on comfy sofas at households she work at when the hosts are away at work – probably mostly in offices
2. 3. 2016
holiday time (with screaming from families in my neighbourhood for a few days now) shows us the need of family teamwork & communication training
i’m coming home with a camera – a reminder to observe, listen and learn more about my parents, relatives, present and past, corners of the house we live in
many thanks dear Hanoi DocLab people for your support ♡
26. 1. 2017
unfolds in front of my eyes with generous lines of trees, peaceful speed of life and gentle, respectful people. Wooden floors, tricycles, 1920s colonial feel. Motorbikes are not allowed here, public bus service can be chaotic.
Yangon seems like a fusion of Hanoi in the 90s with bits and bits of modernity and *democracy*. It feels like traveling with a time machine to the past, present and (political) future.
Developing countries, smile ~ breathe and go slowly, please
15 may 2016
~ and that present became history again…
You have fancied that ice-cream coconut for a while. Today you finally bought it, turns out they put factory ice-cream inside the coconut right in front of you.
Your dad ‘likes that you’re interested in a green forest film event’ at L’espace on Facebook because he ‘follows’ you. He and your aunt both like your post though they argued and don’t talk in real life, now they get to see nice chosen photos of each other online.
After an(other) anthropology talk-discussion event, which is often a good masturbation for the mind, you and the speaker talked about study options to end up with – the happiest thing to do is probably to grow vegetables. But of course you gotta try it first, you might not be able to. We’ll see.
The ice-cream is alright, because you’re sitting on a beanbag looking to West Lake with some wind playing around you.
4. 4. 2017
~
you can hold her hand
and show her how you cry
explain to her your weakness so she understands
and then roll over and die
you can brave decisions
before you crumble up inside
spend your time asking everyone else’s permission
then run away and hide
you can sit on chimneys
with some fire up your ass
no need to know what you’re doing or waiting for
but if ever anyone should ask
tell them, i’ve been licking coconut skins,
and we’ve been hanging out
tell them, God just dropped by to forgive our sins,
and relieve us our doubt
you can hold her eggs
but your basket has a hole
you can lie between her legs and go looking for
tell her you’re searching for her soul
you can wait for ages
watch your compost turn to coal
but time is contagious
and everybody’s getting old
so you can sit on chimneys
with some fire up your ass
no need to know what you’re doing or looking for
but if ever anyone should ask
tell them, i’ve been cooking coconut skins,
and we’ve been hanging out
tell them, ‘God just dropped by to forgive our sins,
and relieve us our doubt
coconut skins ~ damien rice, to all the confused boys in/ out of love
release us
we’ll feed you indeed
from our breathing out
can you hide in the cloud
no need to give us a shout
just be there and chill out
take care of your crowds
has it been fair enough
for humans to balance what we’ve caused
locked down in the house
with fears to embrace
to play more indoor
reflecting on our cores
instead of more, more, more
treating our sores
and flaws
draw our dreams
watching old films
streaming with our teams
making our own creams
parents living together peacefully, finally
mum even made apple cider vinegar
and practised yogaaa
thank you for pushing us inwards
with your swords through our chests
to rest and balance the harmony we lost
when we fought for what we got caught in
to be seen with what we “should” be keen on
to clean our sins
has it been enough
breathing in
we release you, covid
breathing out
please go play above the clouds
and slow down
~ sam, scribbling in bed before and after sleeping
17 feb 2022, hanoi ~ with omicron spreading
breathing & playing 